But, before i go about in writing further on a suggestive manner in which parents can actually spare the 'Rod Theory' in the lifelong process of raising their kids, i would like to throw some light on the the psychological and sociological philosophy behind their means to retard to this counter productive technique used by them.
With the people around the world struggling in this 21st century, for, i will not say aristocracy, but bare survival with all comforting accomodities such as a house, a car, a LCD television , 3 healthy meals a day and bare the sky high educational expenditures, the pressure and tight schedule which the parents are routined is quite significant. But is this an excuse enough for the increasing atrocities on children by their parents ? I will say NO. The other aspect that should be looked upon while understanding the perception of parents is what they learnt from the activities around them while they were in the transitional period of childhood to an adult. They or their friends being unemployed after their basic education, competition with the number of job seeking aspirants increasing with every opportunity and their personal failures in life also play an effective role in the mindset that is adopted by them. Here, i will sympathize with the adults but sill stay with my ideology that actions outplay the circumstances.
With the people around the world struggling in this 21st century, for, i will not say aristocracy, but bare survival with all comforting accomodities such as a house, a car, a LCD television , 3 healthy meals a day and bare the sky high educational expenditures, the pressure and tight schedule which the parents are routined is quite significant. But is this an excuse enough for the increasing atrocities on children by their parents ? I will say NO. The other aspect that should be looked upon while understanding the perception of parents is what they learnt from the activities around them while they were in the transitional period of childhood to an adult. They or their friends being unemployed after their basic education, competition with the number of job seeking aspirants increasing with every opportunity and their personal failures in life also play an effective role in the mindset that is adopted by them. Here, i will sympathize with the adults but sill stay with my ideology that actions outplay the circumstances.
As the Bible tells us: "He who spareth the rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him correcteth him betimes" (Proverbs 13:24) and "Withhold not correction from a child: for if thou strike him with the rod, he shall not die. Thou shalt beat him with the rod, and deliver his soul from hell." (Proverbs 23:13-14)
This is what the Holy Bible speaks on spanking the kids and as many would agree that this, infact is effective in imparting discipline, honesty, forthright, incorruptible, hard working, learned, socially conscious, environmentally sensitive, generous, polite, broad-minded, non-violent and tolerant character in children at a very tender age.
But that is not the case; on the contrary spanking, verbal abuse and punitive means to teach children will simply cause stress disorders (anxiety neurosis, obsessive compulsive disorders, etc.,) or even psychotic illnesses like the multiple-personality disorder. Hurt children may also turn to causeless rebellion, develop self-destructive traits, resort to vandalism, do drugs or veer towards alcoholism .
It is noteworthy, that in India, there are statutes and organisations to protect everyone and everything — animals, women against domestic violence by husband or in-laws and dowry harassment, underprivileged children, street children, dams, rivers, trees, turtles, the environment and rightly so. But there is no one to pick the cudgels on behalf of children who may be vulnerable targets of abusive parents. Such children are the most hapless and unfortunate of sufferers.
This is what the Holy Bible speaks on spanking the kids and as many would agree that this, infact is effective in imparting discipline, honesty, forthright, incorruptible, hard working, learned, socially conscious, environmentally sensitive, generous, polite, broad-minded, non-violent and tolerant character in children at a very tender age.
But that is not the case; on the contrary spanking, verbal abuse and punitive means to teach children will simply cause stress disorders (anxiety neurosis, obsessive compulsive disorders, etc.,) or even psychotic illnesses like the multiple-personality disorder. Hurt children may also turn to causeless rebellion, develop self-destructive traits, resort to vandalism, do drugs or veer towards alcoholism .
It is noteworthy, that in India, there are statutes and organisations to protect everyone and everything — animals, women against domestic violence by husband or in-laws and dowry harassment, underprivileged children, street children, dams, rivers, trees, turtles, the environment and rightly so. But there is no one to pick the cudgels on behalf of children who may be vulnerable targets of abusive parents. Such children are the most hapless and unfortunate of sufferers.
People spend a considerable amount of time and money to learn about everything they believe is vital for their survival, they choose to go abroad and specialize in their respective fields of education but do they willingly accept and implement any advise that is given on how to learn the art of managing their children ? I guess only a handful .
A 40 year old parent expecting a 15 year old to understand what he desires for his kid is not wise, rather it should be the other way round, 40 yrs old should understand what the 15 yr old desires and then help him with his/her experience to achieve that.
Spanking or using a Rod is thus, not even justified even as a last resort of handling kids.What should be understood by parents is that a child is born with the inputs as on a blank sheet of paper, and they are the ones who have to write a beautiful story on that sheet of paper while with the consensus of their child and must not imply their desires and not create what they always wanted to be out of their child. Good upbringing is all about training a child to be a good citizen and an asset to society. To this end, a parent has to think of the ideal citizen and try to encourage – remember, ‘encourage’ and NOT force – the child to become this ideal.
I am and will always be grateful to my parents for their sacrifices in life that made me what i am today and for the manner in which i was brought up , which infact is what many unfortunates in this world have never and will never be able to perceive. My only motive behind this post is to spread awareness and motivate parents around the globe that what they should deliver and what their child might be expecting from them.
A 40 year old parent expecting a 15 year old to understand what he desires for his kid is not wise, rather it should be the other way round, 40 yrs old should understand what the 15 yr old desires and then help him with his/her experience to achieve that.
Spanking or using a Rod is thus, not even justified even as a last resort of handling kids.What should be understood by parents is that a child is born with the inputs as on a blank sheet of paper, and they are the ones who have to write a beautiful story on that sheet of paper while with the consensus of their child and must not imply their desires and not create what they always wanted to be out of their child. Good upbringing is all about training a child to be a good citizen and an asset to society. To this end, a parent has to think of the ideal citizen and try to encourage – remember, ‘encourage’ and NOT force – the child to become this ideal.
I am and will always be grateful to my parents for their sacrifices in life that made me what i am today and for the manner in which i was brought up , which infact is what many unfortunates in this world have never and will never be able to perceive. My only motive behind this post is to spread awareness and motivate parents around the globe that what they should deliver and what their child might be expecting from them.
